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Napoleon Dynamite Quotes

So you saw the movie and are looking for the best Napoleon Dynamite Quotes so you can laugh at this hilarious cast of characters one more time? You found the place right here. This page contains the most sought after Napoleon Dynamite Movie Quotes. We watched this movie several times to ensure that we got as many as possible.

Napoleon:  (in reference to the dance) Who are you gonna ask?
Pedro:  That girl over there.
Napoleon:  Summer Wheatley? How the heck are you gonna do that?
Pedro:  Build her a cake or something.

Nathan:  Napoleon, give me some of your tots.
Napoleon:  No, go find your own.
Nathan:  Come on, give me some of your tots.
Napoleon:  No, I'm freakin' starving! I didn't get to eat anything today.
Nathan:  (Kicks the tots)
Napoleon:  Ugh! Gross! Freakin' idiot!!!

Napoleon:  Well, what is there to eat?
Grandma:  Knock it off Napoleon, just make yourself a dang quesa-dilluh!

Deb:  It's Deb and I am calling to let you know that I think that you are a shallow friend.
Napoleon:  What the heck are you even talking about?

Napoleon:  What are you doing here Uncle Rico?
Uncle Rico:  Grandma took a little spill at the sand dunes today. Broke her coccyx.

Napoleon:  Sorry I'm late. I just got done taming a wild honeymoon stallion for you guys.

Napoleon:  Tina, you fat lard, come get some DINNER!... Tina, eat. Food. Eat the FOOD!

Deb:  What are you drawing?
Napoleon:  A liger.
Deb:  What is a liger?
Napoleon:  It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed - bred for its skills in magic.

Grandma:  How was school?
Napoleon:  The worst day of my life; what do you think?

Uncle Rico:  What about your girlfriend?
Kip:  Well, things are getting pretty serious right now. I mean, we chat online for, like, two hours every day so I guess you could say things are gettin' pretty serious.

Napoleon:  How long did it take you to grow that moustache?
Pedro:  A couple of days.

Trisha:  Thanks for the beautiful drawing. It's hanging in my room right now.
Napoleon:  Really? It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done.

Napoleon:  How long did it take you to grow that mustache?
Pedro:  A couple of days.

Napoleon:  What kind of bike do you have?
Pedro:  It's a Sledgehammer.
Napoleon:  Dang! You got shocks, pegs - lucky! You ever take it off any sweet jumps?
Napoleon:  (cut away to bike jumping scene) You got like three feet of air that time dude!

Kip: Hi.
Napoleon: Is grandma there?
Kip: No, shes getting her hair done.
Napoleon: Uuuuuuuuuuuggggggggggghhhhhhh
Kip: What do you need?
Napoleon: Could you just go get her for me.
Kip: I'm really busy right now.
Napoleon: Well, just tell her to come get me.
Kip: Why?
Napoleon: Cuz I don't feel good.
Kip: Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
Napoleon: No, she doesn't know anything.
Napoleon: Will you just come get me?
Kip: No.
Napoleon: Well, will you do me a favor then?
Kip: What?
Napoleon: Can you bring me my chapstick?
Kip No, Napoleon.
Napoleon: But, my lips hurt real bad!
Kip: Just borrow some from the school nurse I know shes got like 5 or 6 in her drawer.
Napoleon: I'm not gonna use hers u sicko!
Kip: See ya. (hangs up phone)
Napoleon: UGH! IDIOT!

Napoleon:  I caught you a delicious bass.