Funny Short Sayings

You will find many popular funny short sayings on the page below.  Have you ever wished that you could find just the right funny short sayings to put use as a comeback or something similar?  Maybe even on a homemade birthday card?  Well here are some ideas.  Should you wish to contribute more of these sayings, simply log in and click "Submit" from the menu bar.  If you are not already a registered user, sign up for our free Quote of The Day mailing!  Try searching for funny short sayings with our search engine if what you want is not here.   And now on to the funny short sayings ...



funny short quotes

I couldn't fix your brakes, so I made your horn LOUDER!
-- Source Unknown


Black Holes are where God divided by zero.
-- Source Unknown


Money Talks ... but all mine ever says is Goodbye!
-- Source Unknown


I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it?
-- Source Unknown


I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this?
-- Source Unknown


Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
-- Mark Twain


Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
-- Source Unknown


Dolphins: Don't trust a species that's always smiling, its up to something!
-- Source Unknown


A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of.
-- Burt Bacharach


Hard work never hurt anyone, but why take the chance.
-- Source Unknown


1st rule of intelligent tinkering - save all the parts.
-- Source Unknown


I saw Elvis. He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.
-- Source Unknown